Friday, March 30, 2007
im tired. yet im not tired.
im smiling yet im crying.
im happy yet im sad.
i feel so contradictory nowadays.
maybe thats how spore kids get depression nowadays. -.- hahas.
just wanna be true to myself.
the guilt stays. yet i try to make myself less guilty by not thinking. running away.
haizz... i miss our seniors! when i saw nuanting today, cant help but felt really touched and happy. memories of last year's trainings flood into my mind. i still prefer to be a junior...
ahhh. anyway today's match was yea great? supposedly anyway. but who ask me to be so stupid. to win 11-0. won someone who prob doesnt know how to play. i don feel happy. i don feel proud. i felt guilty. really super guilty. then they had to rub it in. thanks. they are so nice. -.-
i don wanna think anymore. i just wanna let nature take its course. i promised i will try my best and i will. i promised that i wont give up. and i wont. be it this or that. a promise will be kept :D jiayou we can do it! i can put everything aside just to concentrate on this.
i just wanna be happy, really happy (: